The cornerstone of my training in the field of psychology is rooted in psychodynamic principles. Yet I now consider myself as someone who takes an integrative approach to therapy. I often use concepts from various other disciplines as I deem necessary (e.g. mindfulness, CBT) , depending upon the circumstances presented, for each individual is unique and has different needs.
Over the last several years I have been incorporating the ideas of Relational Life Therapy into my practice, and have now become fully certified as a Relational Life therapist. I particularly love the concepts of this school of thought, because the principles blend so easily with my psychodynamic foundation. In addition, and perhaps more importantly, there is an emphasis on showing up in the world and in our relationships as our best selves, leading with generosity, gaining an understanding of where our behaviors come from and how to change them, and honoring vulnerability as a positive.
I started this journey, toward becoming more “relational” as I had a passion for working with couples that were in distress and was looking for an effective and highly efficient way of honing in on the issues quickly and powerfully. And I found it using these techniques which I now apply to both couples and individuals.
Relationships and Marriage
Do you feel alone in your relationship?
Are you always arguing or bickering?
Do you feel unheard or misunderstood?
Has the emotional & physical intimacy you once had with your partner fallen by the wayside?
Do you wonder why the smallest things turn into such a big deal?
Have you forgotten what attracted you to your partner in the first place?
Does the daily grind get in the way, making you feel more like roommates than lovers? Has communication become strained or stopped altogether?
If there has been an affair, are you wondering if you can repair your connection, or it means the end of your relationship?
Many of the couples I treat answered “yes” to some or all of these questions. We all share the basic need for true connection with others, especially our partners. People who run into difficulty making and maintaining connections most often were never taught how, or are unfamiliar with the origins of their own communication style.
Couples come to me when they are feeling defeated, fed up, lost, angry, disconnected and/or sad. Some are combative in their relationship, some are withdrawn, and some are on the brink of divorce or parting ways. If you recognize yourself here, trust there is hope. If you’ve tried individual or couples therapy in the past and have been disappointed, please do not yet give up. I tend to focus on aspects of your dynamic with your partner that can sometimes be overlooked, yet make all the difference in the world.
As a licensed psychologist using a tele-health platform, I will work with you and your partner to hone in on the patterns that have disrupted your intimacy and caused you pain. We’ll discover why you each do what you do, and how to do it differently so you can once again create the relationship you fell in love with.
Why Relational Life Therapy?
I have a practice rooted in Relational Life Therapy (Terry Real). Rather than only listening and validating, I will also be highly interactive, bring new understanding to both your own behaviors and feelings, as well as to the “dance” within the relationship .
Relational Life Therapy quickly gets to the heart of the matter through detailed examination of your current relationship and your family of origin. We’ll discover the relationship skills you learned early on that now cause you difficulty and dissatisfaction. Our sessions provide a forum for “joining through the truth”, which in turn promotes a level of reckoning within you and your partner about how you want to show up in the relationship moving forward.
Doing this work will bring you a deeper sense of awareness that allows for a more connected, authentic, healthy way of life. Working this way allows vulnerability to safely enter into the room, which in turn promotes intimacy, both emotionally and physically. You’ll develop an outlook that is cherishing and loving – personally and toward one another–that will carry over into all areas of your lives.
Anxiety and Depression
Do you often feel nervous, anxious, or worried?
Are you experiencing panic attacks or having trouble sleeping?
Conversely, are you spending more time in bed than usual, feeling down, numb, or blasé towards each day?
We all experience being sad or blue at times, or being nervous under certain circumstances. Yet being diagnosed with anxiety or depression is something different, as the symptoms are significantly more intense and persistent. Both of these diagnoses are quite common and although they are two different conditions, many people experience them simultaneously.
Patients affected by anxiety and depression experience varying degrees of symptoms, meaning there is no one size fits all approach to treatment. Yet one universal statement I would make is – reach out and seek treatment and support, as there is no reason to try and manage these often overwhelming symptoms on your own with the hope that they will magically disappear.
I use an integrated approach, pulling from various disciplines, when working with those that come to me for anxiety and/or depression. Together we can unpack the symptoms of your unique experiences and develop new skills, coping mechanisms, and supports to help you through each day.
Life Changes and Transitions
They say change is the only constant, but that doesn’t make it easy. Life transitions can bring up feelings of loss, disconnection, insecurity, and fear. While you may expect to feel disoriented by some changes, like divorce or the death of a loved one, even positive life events can disrupt your mental and emotional equilibrium. Moving in with a partner, getting married, and having children might all be exciting life goals, but they each come with their own adjustment period, too. I can help you navigate the waters of change, helping you feel grounded and focused on the path ahead while honoring all that’s come before.
Take the first step: Contact me today to book your free 20-minute consultation.